


with every drop of rain (singing i love you, i love you, i love you)

by pocketsofposies



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:26:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28476882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pocketsofposies/pseuds/pocketsofposies
Summary: Jung Jinsoul is a drug.Everyone who thought they had her felt lucky. Everyone who lost her suffered their own way.Kim Jungeun thought she was neither. She never wanted to have her. She was never hers in the first place. That meant that she never could have lost her.
Relationships: Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 4
Kudos: 62





	with every drop of rain (singing i love you, i love you, i love you)

Jung Jinsoul is a drug.

Everyone who thought they had her felt lucky. Everyone who lost her suffered their own way.

Kim Jungeun thought she was neither. She never wanted to have her. She was never hers in the first place. That meant that she never could have lost her.

… or so she believed.

Or so she was sure of.

She’d confessed to her years ago, back in high school. Like a coward, she couldn’t tell her face to face.

_’ **you:** i liked you’  
‘ **you:** i did for a few months, but that was it’  
‘ **you:** i hope we’re still cool’_

And they were. They remained friends. Not the closest, but there was a sense of deeper understanding between them that nobody could begin to fathom.

At least, that’s how it felt like to her. She had always hoped that it was the case for Jinsoul, too.

And then there was Jiwoo. She couldn’t bare to watch her devote herself to loving Jinsoul. Jiwoo has been and will always be Jungeun’s best friend— nothing would change that. Their friendship grew more and more and they would become inseperable.

But seeing Jiwoo fall in love with Jinsoul… it was painful to watch. It was painful watching her best friend get hurt over and over again but love Jinsoul so patiently and so selflessly.

Jinsoul isn’t the type of person to fall in love. She isn’t the type of person to commit to a heart. It was difficult for her, too, being loved by Jiwoo, because even if she _was_ falling for her, she believed that she would only end up hurting her. She couldn’t do that to her. Not Jiwoo.

So Jinsoul and Jiwoo were a story that was always there, just short of happening.

Jungeun had gone on with her life not once thinking of Jinsoul. She met other people, kissed other girls, fell in love with other smiles, had her heart broken by other hands. But somewhere deep inside her, she somehow knew that she couldn’t really shake that feeling off.

She fell for Haseul. She truly did love her, and she was loved by her. Her first love— that she knew of— but things didn’t work out.

And about two years ago, right before Jinsoul graduated, she found herself more devastated thinking she would never see her again than when she and Haseul broke up.

_”We’ll still hang out, Jungie. Don’t be so dramatic,” Jinsoul grinned as she nudged her playfully._

_“Yeah, I know,” she replied. “you, me and Jiwoo,”_

_Jinsoul nodded, gazing thoughtfully at the students inside the gym. “Can’t believe it’s my last official day here before graduation,”_

_“Me neither…” Jungeun hummed. “I have to get going now, though. We’re going on a family trip and my dad is probably outside school already,”_

_“Aw… alright,” Jinsoul turned to look at her. “Bye, Jungie.”_

_Jungeun smiled at her, a little sadly at that. Unexpectedly, she had gotten pulled into a hug._

_After a second, Jinsoul pulled away to hold onto her shoulders._

_“Screw it, it’s our last day anyway,” Jinsoul muttered. She pulled her back in gently and gave her a kiss that lingered on her cheek._

_Her lips were soft on her skin. It was brief. Jinsoul leaned back and smiled at her for the last time before she walked back to her seat._

_Jungeun forced herself to walk away. Countless thoughts swirled in her head as she did, but one thing was constant._

_Jung Jinsoul still had a hold on her.  
_

Now she finds herself in the care of a bus stop under the rain.

To make things worse, Jinsoul is beside her.

“I never thought all of us would hang out again,” Jinsoul says, clearly satisfied with how the day went.

“Me neither,” Jungeun nods.

“And Jiwoo… I didn’t know she was dating someone. Sooyoung seems really nice, right?”

There’s a lump in her throat. She nods at the mention of her name. She didn’t really expect her to bring Jiwoo up. “Yeah… The two of them look cute together,”

“How about you, Jungie?” Jinsoul nudges her. “Still single?”

Jungeun rolls her eyes, chuckling. “Apparently. I think I’d like to keep it that way,”

“Yeah. Relationships are too complicated,”

“As if you don’t jump from relationship to relationship,”

“Hey,” Jinsoul laughs. “it’s called flirting. I don’t date them. Not my problem if they fall in love, especially after I tell them I have no intention in catching them if they do. And it’s not like you’re any different, if not worse,”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she folds her arms over her chest.

“How many people have you hooked up with?” Jinsoul asks.

Jungeun arched a brow. “Like… three? Only?”

“And what are their names?”

She scoffs. “They’re just flings. Kissing strangers is not worse than leading people on,”

“Whatever you say, Jungie. You and I are alike no matter how much you deny it,”

The bus comes into view around the corner at the end of the street.

Silence falls between them again as they wait for it to arrive.

It gives Jungeun more time to think. It’s exactly the last thing she wants to do.

“Well… that’s my sweet ride,” Jinsoul grins. “See you next time?”

She nods. “If there _is_ a next time.”

Jinsoul laughs lightly, pulling her into a warm hug.

_God_ , it brings her back to Thursday afternoons when the two of them were left alone and Jinsoul would rest her head on Jungeun’s shoulder. It brings her back to Jinsoul comforting her and hugging her for almost an hour when she and Haseul broke up and all she could think about at the time was how nice it felt to be in her arms. It brings her back to their last hug back at the gymnasium, and it brings the lingering feeling of her lips on Jungeun’s cheek that she just couldn’t forget.

And Jinsoul is walking away again. She waits for the bus to come to a halt in front of them.

Before she can stop herself, Jungeun already has her hand reaching for Jinsoul’s.

She looks back at her. “What is it?”

_Crap._ What was she thinking?

The bus’s door swings open, pressuring her further.

“... Thanks. For today,” Jungeun croaks out. “Bye, Soul,”

Jinsoul smiles at her. “Back at you, Jungie,”

She disappears behind fogged up windows, leaving her standing there.

Jungeun isn’t sure of exactly what it is she’s feeling, but she’s sure that it would be best if it never left her lips. It either dies down or dies with her.

She’s afraid that even after decades, the latter would still be the case.


End file.
